Stephen Harper, Promise Keepers, and "we might have a war"

From the Globe & Mail: "... Mr. Harper was introduced at the news conference by David Sweet, the Tory candidate in Ancaster-Dundas- Flamborough- Westdale. Mr. Sweet is a former president of Promise Keepers Canada, an evangelical Christian organization that believes homosexuality is a sin.

"In a November, 2001, edition of Christian Week magazine, he wrote: '[M]en are natural influencers, whether we like it or not. There's a particular reason why Jesus called men only. It's not that women aren't co-participators. It's because Jesus knew women would naturally follow.'

"Yesterday afternoon, Mr. Harper shared the stage with Harold Albrecht, the Conservative candidate in Kitchener-Conestoga, at a rally attended by about 800 enthusiastic supporters.

"Mr. Albrecht is pastor and founder of the Pathway Community Church. In June of 2004, he wrote in a letter to a Kitchener newspaper: 'If one is truly committed to the marriage vows of fidelity, these same-sex marriages would succeed in wiping out an entire society in just one generation.'

"When reporters tried to question Mr. Albrecht about his views after the rally, Conservative handlers blocked them from getting close. Mr. Albrecht was hustled into a kitchen where he stood alone as the news media were told he was too busy to speak with them."

O, the Promise Keepers -- another wretched boys' club that appeals to all the venal, immature, crybaby whims of sophomoric male egos. These heroes are all into "manhood" and the subjugation of women, and simply being all-around unsmiling self-righteous pricks to their families. In the past year or two, I've known a couple of people who have had Promise Keepers in their lives, and these god warriors showed themselves to be nothing more than wife-beating assholes motivated by Scripture rather than beer. One of these gimps was a whore-monger who once chastized his brother-in-law -- my friend -- for saying naughty words while in traffic. My friend asked his Promise Keeper brother-in-law if he required the same of the hookers he frequented.

Where you have religion, you have the kindling for insanity. Where you have fundamentalist religiosity, you have the hell-bright flames of catastrophe.

From Rigorous Intuition we learn that "[l]ast night in an interview on CBC, Stephen Harper said he couldn't promise that a Conservative government wouldn't take Canada into deficit because "we might have a war." OK, it's not too late, we have finally learned behind which Christ Stephen Harper throws his allegiance -- and this Christ's first name ain't Jesus.

Before some knee-jerk conservative accuses me of being a "Paul Martin Liberal," let's take it from the top:

No party should govern for 12 years, I don't care who they are. The fact that it's the Liberal Party in question here makes this statement all the more true and pressing. The Liberals must go.

As for the NDP, their ideas about "positive discrimination" are positively racist -- against the caucasian people for whom they have such distaste, but even more so for the people of color whom they so fervently embrace. The NDP doesn't believe in filling government positions based on a person's competence. This is where their patent racism comes into the play. The NDP believes that caucasians -- white men, in particular -- are so superior to all other races, that the rules must be skewed and positive discrimination instituted to give inferiors a shot. This is outrageous. It's bullshit and it's insulting to people on every side of the political spectrum. As a Canadian citizen, I want to see the most qualified people working for the government. I don't care about their country of origin, their gender, their preference for music -- I want their competence. The NDP seems to think that running the government involves posing for rainbow coalition photo-ops all day long. It does not.

But Stephen Harper. O, Stephen Harper, you ulterior-motive, hidden-agenda, war-monger-in-waiting, conservative's Conservative. Somehow Canadians forget that it was a conservative government that saddled the country with the GST. Sure, those were other conservatives. So, if I run as a Liberal candidate in the next election, will this same rubbery logic allow me to say, "I'm the other kind of Liberal"? Of course not. Brian Mulroney and his mafia of swine set the tone for the Corruption of Chrétien. Tory Mike Harris treated Ontario like a Promise Keeper treats his wife, but Harris was one of those other conservatives.

At this point in time, Canada's greatest problem is its culture of corruption, incompetence and patronage in Ottawa. Our political process and machinations are a disgrace and an insult to all thinking people. Add conservatism to this steaming fecal stew and the country will be enveloped by a whole new stench.

"[W]e might have a war" says Stephen Harper.

No matter the results of Monday's election, I think Canadians should mobilize and surround Ottawa, carrying torches, rakes, and pitchforks, as villagers did when they converged on Doctor Frankenstein's castle in the old Boris Karloff movies. The horror in those old films was canned and cartoonish by today's standards. The horror festering in Ottawa is the Andromeda Strain.

Process of Humiliation

That is what keeps decent people from running for politics -- that groping, pandering process of humiliation before voters go to the polls.

My opinons of the politicos running:

Paul Martin forever has the look on his face of a child being berated by a teacher. Who'd ever guess the man is filthy rich? But he does truly embody the unsmiling satire that is Canadian politics -- a former interest-conflicted finance minister who reflags the ships of his shipping company in order to avoid paying Canadian taxes. And who is there to call him on it? The Opposition? They have all the credibility of defense attorneys -- they'll cry "Nay" no matter what the person in power does.

Seeing those Liberal Party lawn signs with their tagline: "Paul Martin's Liberal Party" may as well read "E. coli's Hamburgers."

My problem with Stephen Harper? Purely physiological. The look of his pale face and bleached blue eyes has me convinced no blood circulates to his head. Blood is filled with ideas, and if the marriage of blood and brain is not consummated, you don't end up with a stupid individual, but a scary one. Conservatives are the ones who gave Canada the GST. We tend to forget that.

Jack Layton, purveyor of "positive discrimination," indiscriminant spender of those so-far-out-of-reach tax dollars, I applaud your applause for the Canadian health care system. Clayton reminds me of well-meaning clergymen who have never lived in the world, have all sorts of ideas about living in the world, who sit and rock themselves into oblivion in the shadows of their cat-pissing-smelling parlors.

Gilles Duceppes is like the little brother running after the pack of older kids, shouting, "Wait up, you's!"

Every Canadian election is an exercise in short-sightedness. The electorate is only concerned with "sticking it" to the ruling party, never giving a thought to the culture of corruption that exists in Ottawa. Remember during the 2000 American election and how George W. Bush promised to return integrity to the White House. Well, if you weigh W.'s sins against Bill Clinton's and still believe that dignity can be achieved with "daisy cutters", then you have the same spiritual compass as Savonarola and Pat Robertson.

Satire and vitriol aside, Canada doesn't need privatized health care or the privatization of its Crown corporations, but it certainly needs something from the private sector -- some expertise. The next Prime Minister of Canada should call appeal to the patriotism of the CEO of Tim Horton's, for instance, and other such successful, thriving Canadian corporations, and ask their input on how to liposuction the rotting bloat from the such institutions as our health care system, et al.

The question of this election in my mind is: How serious are Canadians about having their country run with a modicum of honesty, a tad of competence, and a smidge of vision?

The Bard of Jolly Crescent

Leonard Cohen on the Late Irving Layton: "I taught him how to dress, he taught me how to live forever."

Rest in Peace, Irving Layton

No poet ever thought more of himself than Irving Layton, nor more enjoyed being photographed shirtless.

First Whiff of Bullshit of 2006: "PM to get tough with gun-violence offenders"

PM to get tough with gun-violence offenders:

Prime Minister Paul Martin has thrown his support behind a multi-government effort to keep those accused of gun violence in jail.

The onus will be on anyone accused of committing a gun crime to show why they should not be locked up until they are tried if a proposal by Mr. Martin, Ontario Premier Dalton McGuinty and Toronto mayor David Miller goes ahead.

Sounds great, doesn't it? But see how it will play in actual practice with our flaccid judiciary:

JUDGE (addressing OFFENDER at a "reverse onus" bail hearing): You are before this court to explain why you should not be locked up until you are tried for the crime of assault with a deadly weapon.

OFFENDER: 'Cause I don't wanna be in jail.

JUDGE: OK, that's good enough for me. You may leave on your own recognizance. (Pause) Uh, could you use some car-fare?

Canadian justice is dead in the water until we bring people to the bench who live in our communities, share our values, who believe crime is a crime and violent criminals are not lost puppy dogs.